Why friends?

[Rick Hagen]

OK, I'm going to admit my ignorance here and ask what this "friend" stuff is about. What is the advantage to having friends on this network? Don't get me wrong - I'm all for making new friends, but why should I bother to deal with these friend requests. Is it just some kind of popularity contest, or does it enable some kind of additional functionality?

[Daniel Wheeler]

Well with sites like myspace it is mostly a popularity contest but here I'm not so sure. I've met a few guys on here that I will definitely look for at future venues and festivals because of their friend requests. On myspace of another social site that would be kinda stalker-ish. But that's my take.

[Bill Jensen]

I am afraid that I agree with Rick. I got a couple of friends requests from people I don't know, and when I asked them why they had sent the request, I got no reply. I decided to delete my friends list and start it again, trying to avoid the 'how-many-friends-can-I-get' syndrome, but it appears that you cannot delete people from the 'friends list'. I get the feeling that it is a pimply, prepubescent, irrelevance that dribbled in from 'MySpace'.

[Doc Roberts]

I'm flattered, if not a bit baffled, about such requests. If I accept will I be pummelled with additional requests? Will I have to spend hours and hours accepting or denying friendships? Will I have to run credit checks and criminal background checks? I don't date just anyone, you know.

I have to confess that just "building" my page was a headache producing event. My color-sense is terrible enough without having the whole world know I have no taste. I agonized over whether people would think me tasteless if I chose the wrong color combinations.

Now I have to make decisions as to whether I like someone enough to okay their request to be my friend. I don't know, folks, I'm just an average guy and life is tricky enough without having to make such life altering decisions.

And what if after accepting me as your friend you decide to drop me? Didn't I deserve an explanation? Aren't I, after all, a human with feelings and stuff. Is there someone else?

[John Bauman]

As I understand it, the guy with the fewest friends at the end of each month has to buy drinks for everyone.

Sure, I could be wrong...

...but with, like, 500 members do you really want to take a chance on that?

[Dan Miller]

On networks like myspace and facebook the friends thing can turn into a promotion/popularity gimmick where you get people who you have nothing in common with requesting to be your friend out of the blue, however, here we are all flatpickers. We are a small group. We all have at least that one thing in common. You read someone's profile and see that they also own a Collings guitar, or they also live in Missouri, or they also go to Kaufman's Kamp...more things in common... so you reach out and say, "Hey, let's be friends." In my view, the friends feature is not only a way to connect with people you already know, it is a way to make new friends. Then maybe I'm friends with someone and I take a look at that person's page and see that they are friends with someone I don't know, so I take a look at their profile and see that I also have some things in common with them. So I reach out there too. And I make a lot of new friends, and new picking buddies...a social network of flatpicker friends... I don't see any downside to that!

[ed carr]

well i have made comments on people's pages that if i liked their music or if i have seen that they live relatively close and might go to some of the same festivals and possibly pick together. for that reason alone i think the friend feature of the website is worthwhile. not a lot of flatpickers in my corner of the world and everytime i sit across from somebody and share ideas i always come away with more than i went in with. there is something about this music that is real and doesn't seem to attract people that would be superficial enough to just want to win a popularity contest.

[Michael Gurzi]

I view it as a way to stay connected with friends, buddies, or people of interest that you can have quick access to their page w/o having to search for their link each time you want to visit their page. Visiting their page allows you to see what they are up to, read any posts/comments, listen to their music or videos. It makes it very simple.

As Dan said, we are simple folk sharing our passion for flatpicking. Don't over think the network and don't view it as a popularity contest.

Thanks Dan for a great site!

[Dave Engel]

Hi All,

Dan, I love this site! I have also asked this question, you gave me the same answer in an e-mail and I still don't get it. This is a small forum group as you stated... small enough to not have to do this "friends" thing perhaps? I really don't know what to think when I get these "let's be friends" notices in my e-mail. I'm a forum "friend" (if you will) with the entire forum now, right? Everyone now days is good enough with the forum system to go see anyone's home page or e-mail them or whatever without having to be hooked up as "friends". Just my .02. I hope no one gets offended when I don't answer these or reject them.
Dave

[Jim Yates]

I always check out my friends' pages to see what topics they are contributing to or what groups they belong to.

[Dan Cooper]

I'm a member of three Ning networks and from what I can tell, being "Friends" with someone lets you communicate in private rather than posting comments that anyone can read. You may not know your Friends actual email address but Ning lets you send messages (like email) to one or more of your friends that only they can read.